collaborate, the soaring absence-rate and how you struggle to retain talent.

You know what you’re doing isn’t working.

I ask you what you’d like to do differently, and you fall silent. It’s a treadmill you say and you can’t change it. Your teams are exhausted, but you push them on because the CEO screams that the share price has tanked and the sales pipeline is weak.
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I ask again what you’d like to do differently, and frustrated, you say flippantly "give my teams a break! A rest".
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And I see the sadness in your eyes, and your exhaustion. “Maybe that’s what you need too...”

You shake your head, even the HR director simply urged you to tighten up on performance management and employ disciplinary processes if need be. You sigh. “No one sees… no one sees…”

“What don’t they see?” 

“That we’re destroying it all; our reputation, our customer relationships; with poor service and after-care, and our people… We drive them like machines!”

You exhale, and you’re feeling the folly of it all.

And then you smile ruefully, and together we’re contemplating those two opposing forces in life and business. The ‘force for change’, some call will; to set goals and targets, take action, persist, achieve and shape the competitive environment. And opposing it the ‘force for acceptance’, some call love; to empathise with people and care for them, bring them together and to accept current reality in all its complexity. 

We sit silently, feeling the tension between those forces and the awesome task to harmonise them and make business sustainable.
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You shake your head, and say you don’t know where to start.

And yet we make a plan, just baby steps, to begin to shift the balance in your division between achieving business targets and nurturing people and relationships.

And when you return you say it hasn’t been easy, but you’re now acknowledging what people have done instead of simply focusing on what’s next. You’re listening actively and engaging with your colleagues concerns rather than downplaying them. You’ve even championed people getting away from their desks at lunchtime!

But there’s pushback. Your higher–ups claim you’re losing your grip. They’re bringing forward the deadline for your division’s business plan so as to have it completed by the time the top team visit. You sigh, everyone will have to work late nights to achieve that!

You shrug and I feel how it hurts you to consider reneging on the ‘better way’ you’ve promised your teams.
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And then I see your nascent leader emerging, and your passion, to make your division a place where you deliver results AND care for your people.

We imagine how you might inspire them to consider change,and develop your negotiation strategy to get the deadline pushed back, including your red lines. We also work with what holds you back.

And as you leave, you smile and say you’ll give it your best shot, but the important thing was deciding.

“Deciding?”

“To listen to the voice inside, and to speak up and; change or no change, choosing to speak out.
 
​And my heart sings at the leader you’re becoming.

You work on your skill set, right? 

Of course. It’s a must for you as a 21st century professional; to keep up with your field, with work technologies and relevant legislation. …So when did you last upgrade your skills in handling the pressure at work?
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Professionals often tell me that earlier in their career they might have experienced short bursts of high-intensity working, but then things always quietened down again. However, now they feel the pressure at work is relentless.
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Such pressure left unchecked can lead to workplace stress and wreak havoc on health; weakening the immune system, upsetting the digestion, disturbing sleep and more.  Stress can damage relationships inside and outside of work, making people feel miserable and no longer able to enjoy life.

Clients struggling to cope with workplace stress, often ask me if they should leave their role or change career. I tell them : “You have three choices – and leaving to find pastures new is only one of them”.

Here are the other two options.

1. Change the SITUATION that’s stressing you.
2. Change YOURSELF.

Whether you can influence change in your working environment will depend on the culture, how well you relate to your colleagues and what resources are available.

Explore with your boss or colleagues options to reduce pressure and combat stress; these might include deferring deadlines, getting access to extra resource from inside or outside the organisation, doing some work from home and cutting back on the scope of a project. Brainstorm as many ideas as you can and try to make a case.
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And yes, I’m aware that speaking out at work about how you’re experiencing pressure and even stress may carry risks as to how you’re perceived, and may even affect your career progression. However, if your current job with less pressure would still suit you, then maybe it’s worth a try?

Ultimately though, option two may be more fruitful: Change yourself. This means growing your capability to handle the pressure at work.

I imagine you’re already familiar with what I call ‘Level One’ stress management techniques. They include ‘self-care basics’. However, it’s easy to break these positive habits when we’re under pressure.

• Eat a nutritious diet and avoid junk food.
• Exercise and stretch regularly.
• Get enough sleep.

Follow these and you’ll have more strength and vitality to cope.  Level One techniques also include personal rituals:-

• Morning meditation, visualisation and 'setting your intention' for the day.

These tools won’t stop people interrupting your work and diverting your attention from your personal priorities, but they may help you get back on track more easily.

• Remember your boundaries.

Push back on tasks that aren’t in your remit. Be wary of colleagues sweet talking you into accepting work they should be handling. Push back on requests for you to deliver tight turnarounds, particularly when it’s to make up for delays further up the pipeline.

• Remember your emergency stress responses

Learn and practise your breathing techniques, affirmations and calming visualisations for when times get tough.

 OK, but what if you’re still feeling the pressure? That’s where what I call ‘Level Two’ techniques come in.

‘Level Two’ techniques can bring about a step change in how you manage pressure and stress at work. E.g. They’ll enable you to ‘get away’ from work when you’re not there, so that you’re not recreating your 'stress response', and the attendant risks to your health, by thinking about work at home. You may need to work at mastering these techniques, but if you’ll do, you’ll reap huge quality of life rewards.

Here's a brief introduction. 

Are You Too Attached to 'The Outcome'?

• How do you think about your work? If you have fixed ideas about outcomes and what is best for your career; ‘I must win this client’, I must get that promotion, then you’re likely setting yourself up for failure repeatedly, and by doing so adding to your work stress. 

I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t be productive and ambitious in your work role. What’s critical to avoid stress is to be able to ‘just do your best’ and then ‘let go’ of outcomes over which you’ve got no control.

Are You 'Too Identified' With Your Role?

• You may feel you just want to be ‘a good accountant’ or a ‘good salesperson’. But be aware that your job can become a place to ‘prove your worth’.
• If much or ALL of your self-esteem comes from your professional role, work will take on disproportionate importance in your life. You'll risk ‘performance anxiety’. ‘Failures’ will hit harder, and stress will increase.

You can start to explore how attached or identified you are with your role through mindfulness meditation. In addition, there are specific techniques and meditations that can help you reduce your attachment and identification with work. 

Handling pressure and avoiding stress is a key life skill in the 21st century. Perhaps it’s the MOST important professional skill - because it’s fundamental to your ability to keep on working and to enjoy your work!

If you'd like to learn more about advanced techniques for handling pressure and stress you may want to consider personalised stress management coaching as an investment in your career and wellbeing for the long term.

How have you learned to handle pressure? Share what's worked for you in the comments below!